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Week 18 - We begin the week in reflective mode as Sally muses what might have been

Edited BY

G P Kennedy

This week we asked some of our Storytellers to reflect on the differences between August 2019 and 2020. Today Sally frames her thoughts around the idea of 'If I could, I would...'

Sally and the baby - London UK


 This week I decided to look back at what I was doing this time last year.

 

 August 2019.  I had a coffee date with a pregnant friend, I went to a friends anniversary BBQ, I had weekly baby swimming classes and a visit to the baby clinic to get her weighed, I had friend coming to my house for lunch, I met another friend in a pub for lunch, I had a hairdressers appointment, I had a family wedding, I had the in-laws staying, I had a massage, I had a doctors appointment and a dentist appointment, I travelled to Liverpool to see my family and I had work.

A packed August last year

 Scroll forward 12 months to August 2020 and the page is blank apart from things that have been cancelled. A university friends wedding - CANCELLED! 14 days work - CANCELLED!  A visit to Liverpool - CANCELLED!

 

 How my life has changed in a year.

 

 How the world has changed in a year.

 

 So what would I do if I could?  I would definitely see my family, as it’s been nearly 5 months since I last saw them.  I would pack my boyfriend, the baby and myself in the car, I would drive to Liverpool and I would stay at my parents’ house.  I would hug and kiss my mum and dad and let them cuddle and smother the baby in 5 months worth of missed kisses. 

 

 I would let them babysit so me and my boyfriend could go out to the pub for a few drinks then go for a nice meal, just the two of us.  I would visit my sister and nieces. I would visit my old school friends and let their children play with mine, whilst we caught up on 5 months of missed gossip and tales of what we had been up to.

This August is...canceled

 I would go back to Wales and see the in-laws.  We saw them briefly last week on our two days camping but we didn’t hug them and they didn’t hug or kiss the baby. I would see the joy in my boyfriend when he hugged his mum and the joy in her as she cuddled and played with the baby.

 

 I would take the baby back to her swimming classes and to play groups and let her mingle with other children her age and run around free instead of chasing her and pulling her away from people if she gets closer than 2 meters.

 

 I would have said yes and gone on the holiday with my friends who asked us to go to France with them last week.  We would have all stayed in a cabin in a holiday park and we would have gone to BBQ’s and had picnics and drank and laughed and done normal holiday things that you do with friends.

 

 I would be at my university friend’s wedding and watching her walk down the aisle with the love of her life.  I would be drinking too much with my old Uni friends, dancing to cheesy wedding songs, catching up with what’s been going on since last time we all saw each other and feeling the pain the morning after, but loving the fact that I had a fantastic weekend.

 

I would get on the Tube and visit my friends around London, meet them in Art Galleries and see Exhibitions or go to the movies or a bar.

 

 And yes I would go to work!  I am very fortunate to have a job that I love.  Yes its long hours mainly in dark studios but I’ve missed the camaraderie with my colleagues, I miss being creative with my camera shots and being part of a team that creates TV shows.

Socially distanced camping was our only respite this summer

 I miss my own time, as much as I love my boyfriend and the baby, I love being me, just me, not a mum or a partner, being at work and only thinking about the show we are working on and not worrying about where the baby is, what’s she picking up, what’s she putting in her mouth, has she eaten enough for lunch as I know my boyfriend has all that under control when I am at work, like I do when he’s at work.

 

 So that’s what I would do “If I Could I Would”

 

 

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